Tell ya what I want, what I really really want!

Just recently I tried something different, something totally unlike my usual good-self, I went to church. Now the church I went to was a 12th century affair with its beautiful stone work, solid oak doors and vaulted ceilings, there is even a hole in the door where a cannonball had been shot through during the civil war! Even small towns in Britain like Highworth, are steeped in history, all of which fascinates me.

People go to church as they want to get in contact with god, even myself, as an Non-Thesist Agnostic would love to get in contact with the big guy upstairs, as I’ve got a few questions to ask him about his managerial abilities let me tell you! The service I attended was a midnight mass. Although it has a rather dark name, it was a dull & somber affair, considering it is in the name of our so-called savior who died for the sins of all mankind! You’d think they could have put on a bit more of a festive air to thank this man!

After we had all had our fill of Sunday Roast, stuffed to the gills with mince pies, chocolate, cheese, sprouts, puddings, custard and the rest of the trimmings in abundance, we all loll around for the rest of the day feeling like a foi grais goose. Then there are the Sunday miday movies to warm the cockles of ya heart, with my favorite feel good movie, ‘My fair lady’, tell me a man on this good green earth who wouldn’t give a limb for a woman like Audrey. What a gem! Next we have ‘Howls moving castle’, my ultimate house with its mobility, talking fireplace and multi dimensional doorways. Now that’s what I want Santa, I’ll be good, I promise!

When talking to the people around me after they had their gluttonous fill. We get around to the topic of, what is it that they really want? I get the usual answers of material possessions such as cars and the like, but when asked why they want these things? You get a common theme. All people want, [and this is all over the world] can be boiled down to a few things. Health, happiness, purpose and respect. That’s it! Everything else is just trimmings and a means to get these few simple things. We all want to be healthy, that’s obvious, as without health you can’t really enjoy much if your’ crippled, have some sickness, disease or the planet is dieing. Then there is happiness.

What is happiness? Is happiness the accumulation of wealth? Most people in not only today’s society but throughout history believe it to be so. With wealth comes’ all the usual bonuses such as freedom, the beautiful woman, the admiration of others and the ability to help friends and family. Or does it?

Whenever I have had a nice car and a nice place to live my eye just wanders to something more nicer, more expensive, it’s never ending. So it stands to reason that this is not the way to happiness, it’s just yet another tread-mill. So how is happiness really bought about? For me it’s both simple yet complex. Simple things such as good company, laughter, good food, the love and a snuggle with a wonderful woman, solving problems, adventure and many other simple acts bring me a feeling of, well, happiness. It’s not the goods’, it’s the acts that give me happiness! Although a movable castle with Audrey toaccompany me wouldn’t be sniffed at! So that’s happiness. What about purpose?

Most people’s purpose is to make sure their kids do better than themselves, so that is an easy one for the majority. But what about people like myself? Who don’t feel the need to breed, and think that their sexual organs are purely for pleasure and making a mess? It’s not that I don’t like kids, it’s just I see too many unfortunates around the world and the idea of picking up a stray or two is much more appealing to me. So, what is my purpose upon this Earth? I’m afraid, this is something I am yet to find an answer to. So what about respect then?

I think most people get respect, envy and admiration all mixed up. Respect is the stuff you get from people who don’t want anything from you, who come around or call just for the sake of calling, for a chat, and will not be offended if you say ‘Sorry I just need some time away.’ Admiration is appreciation of a job well done. Yes I admire people such as Brunell or a concert pianist, but it is often the simple jobs that bring the most admiration. I remember watching a cleaner whistling a tune polishing the floor at a train station taking rather particular care, he gave me the feeling of admiration. You see admiration is a gift we give others, we get it from others and we give it too others. You can’t give it to yourself. Where as envy, [This is a strange one tome] is other people, wanting what you have or to be you, or you wanting what they have or to be them, which is just plain silly really! When I think about it, there is not much that I want that someone else has or someone else I want to be. I want to be original in my thoughts and ideas, to follow my own path, find my own maturity and become a totally original being, a one off. Wanting to be someone else is really daft, as it has already been done, the job is taken, and you’ll just end up looking a wannabe. Respect is being your-self, doing what you want or need to do and being left alone, and/or being helped to do it.

So there you have it, I know what it is that I want and already have most of it except for the moving castle, Audrey and purpose. So I have a bit still to do considering Audrey is now dead, Howl’s moving castle is an animation and purpose is something that I will never know until it hits me in the face, so is pointless looking for it.

Hmmmmm, what shall one do hey?

Anyways just a thought.